By Jan Connell, Ripley’s Aquarium
During these days of Mom, Dad, stepdad, bonus Mom…well, you get the picture, tradition is not as clearly defined as it has been for previous generations.
Whether your biological parents and stepparents are on friendly terms or well, not so friendly terms it’s helpful for the bridal couple to arrange a time for the entire family to meet on neutral ground to discuss the upcoming wedding plans. A good time to schedule this meeting is shortly after the engagement has been announced and a favorite local restaurant serves as a good venue.
The purpose of the meeting is not only to celebrate the upcoming wedding but to discuss the expectations and plans of the bride and groom. Prior to this meeting the bride and groom should have a written plan of the type of wedding they desire, approximate number of guests, possible locations, number of attendants and a preliminary budget. This meeting is even more important if the bridal couple will be dealing with parents who are still angry or hostile over a bitter divorce. Prewedding tact and diplomacy will go a long way toward ensuring the wedding of your dreams is not spoiled by family tension.
Do not allow yourself to be placed in the middle or feel guilty and it is not unreasonable to ask your parents to set their angry feelings aside for one day. This meeting will also serve as a gentle reminder that your upcoming wedding is only the first of many shared joyous family occasions in the future.